If Elon Musk Wants To Live On Mars, We'll All Throw A Party And Send Him Off
Good riddance
Elon Musk is obsessed with Mars. He wants to build a colony on the Red Planet to serve as a “lifeboat for humanity,” a concept that astrophysicist Adam Becker says “is among the very stupidest things that someone could say.” That’s very on brand for Musk.
“There are so many reasons why it’s such a bad idea, and this is not about, ‘Oh, we’ll never have the technology to live on Mars,’” Dr. Becker told Rolling Stone. “That’s not what I’m saying. What I’m saying is that Earth is always going to be a better option no matter what happens to Earth. Like, we could get hit with an asteroid the size of the one that killed off the dinosaurs, and Earth would still be more habitable. We could explode every single nuclear weapon, and Earth would still be more habitable. We could have the worst-case scenario for climate change, and Earth would still be more habitable.”
It’s true that unless the Earth literally explodes in a fiery death like Krypton, humanity is still better off on terra firma than on Mars, which is just terrible. The planet is freezing and what passes for its atmosphere contains no oxygen. The soil is harmful to plants and people. Researchers have concluded that the surface of Mars is “lethal to vegetative cells and renders much of the surface and near-surface regions uninhabitable.” It’s like Las Vegas without the Strip.
Someone defending Musk’s megalomania posted on social media, “There are a lot of people who dream of going to Mars, it’s not just some rich guy fantasy. Humanity has been talking about this for over a century. Acting like it’s only a billionaire obsession completely ignores the generations of scientists, storytellers, and everyday people who’ve imagined this journey long before it made headlines.”
Humans have long discussed manned missions to Mars, but those were generally for scientific purposes. Actual astronauts who understand and appreciate science would investigate the origins of life and develop new technologies. Sending humans to Mars is significantly more expensive (and riskier) than using robots, but a human presence is more than justified considering the benefit from firsthand knowledge and experience on another world.
Of course, Mars is not someplace even a trained professional would want to remain for long. The exposure to cosmic rays poses a serious health threat without any chance of gaining stretching powers. The radiation can lead to a loss of kidney function and acute cases of “glow-in-the-dark” syndrome. Prolonged weightlessness isn’t ideal for bone density and blood flow.
An actual permanent human settlement on Mars is, like Dr. Becker said, a very stupid idea. People like to theorize about “terraforming” Mars, but we should probably focus on keeping our current planet habitable. If your interest is preserving human life as the population grows, it is far less expensive and safer to build colonies on the ocean floor, and that’s factoring in the inevitable war with Atlantis.
Besides, Elon Musk is the same sociopath who gutted U.S. foreign aid and, as a result, directly contributed to the deaths of at least 300,000 people, including children. He’s hardly a humanitarian, so we should carefully examine his motivations before signing any federal contracts with SpaceX.
Dr. Genevieve Guenther, author of The Language of Climate Politics, posted on social media, “The sick fantasy that Mars is a ‘lifeboat for humanity’ is actually the inevitable extension of the capitalist idea that you can just keep destroying ecosystems and, through the magic of the price system, replace them with human-made technologies instead.”
Musk spent a fortune helping to elect a climate-denying buffoon who insists the planet will “get cooler … you just watch” and repeatedly jokes that rising sea levels from global warming will give you “a little bit more waterfront property if you’re lucky enough though.” Musk is probably fine letting Donald Trump torch the Earth because the richest one percent will always have options. The only downside is what you do with the teeming masses who are treading water in the remains of what was once Tallahassee, Florida.
Darrell M. West at the Brookings Institution recently wrote, “Musk’s Mars idea is not crazy,” which effectively summarizes all the reasons Musk’s Mars idea is crazy.
The planet has a different gravity and atmospheric pressure than Earth, and there are lengthy gaps in Earth-to-Mars communications, all of which complicate the ability of capsules to land there. Large-scale dust storms endanger equipment and solar panels, and we have not yet mastered the science of Mars weather forecasting.
In other words, even if you survive the trip to Mars and land there without exploding, you probably won’t live through the year. There are no Martian natives — certainly no women — who’ll keep your dumb ass alive long enough for you to kill them all. That’s why when Musk talks up Mars as a “lifeboat for humanity,” we should question just who Musk intends to put on the ship. My ancestral memory of unwilling voyages by boat leaves me skeptical. If humanity, especially America, figures out how to send people to Mars (and safely return them — that’s a key point in the contract), the billionaire space tourists will go first to say they did it.
It’s easy to romanticize exploring and settling new frontiers, especially in space, but pioneer life was hard. People died traveling to places that at least technically support human life. There’s no DoorDash on Mars, and the food options are limited. Wealthy space tourists will last about a week on Mars and come back the first time the wifi goes out. Then Mars will just become a dumping ground for “undesirables,” basically Space Australia. They’ll toss poor people, criminals, and left-wing political activists into spaceships and hit the “So Long, Sucker!” launch button.
On Star Trek, the Federation would only make first contact with an alien civilization that has warp drive — so is capable of actually leaving their solar system — and a unified government. War-like, self-destructive societies could probably find their way into the stars, but decent people would want to avoid them. Let’s stop killing ourselve before we take our dysfunction to the stars.
We haven't mastered weather forecasting for Earth.
Baby steps, people.
My friend is making a rocket to the sun I would like to put him on.