I believe this exact phenomenon has left us as a culture wide-open to manipulation, particularly by well-funded state disinformation campaigns that stretch back to the first Trump campaign (and across more than a decade of EU elections). And we seem to lack curiousity or introspection into how we've been manipulated through our divisions. This is an old story: hate *is* violence, and it's self-defeating and self-perpetuating, while choosing non-violence is both hard and brave.
Parenthetically, my wife was not keen on her girls' night viewing of Supergirl. Quote: I wouldn't have been as disappointed if I hadn't expected better (based on writing and directing from previous Superman movie).
I'm scared of where we are all heading. A while back, before twitter became a nazi bar, I had a rando tell me he would gladly shoot me because I had a different opinion from (presumably) him. I point blank asked him if he was really willing to shoot a fellow American over politics and he answered yes. A few days ago, I saw Raskin and Lawler get into a shouting match in Congress and my first thought was "we are almost at the point of someone getting beat by a cane". I have thoughts about Israel, and I don't think it's antisemitic to point out that as a nation, it is very bad, pretty much an apartheid state and I try not to vote for anybody who continues to support it. I don't think they are our ally in any sense of the word. If someone wants to call me names for that, whatever, I guess. But if you start getting physical, that's a whole different ballgame.
As far as Supergirl goes, we didn't go see it because A) movie tickets have become stupid expensive and B) I heard it was dark and murky to hide the bad visual effects. I do see your point that drunk sorority girl might be more fun and lighthearted, especially for a summer superhero movie, than a deeply troubled young woman, but I'm not sure that should end with "go fuck yourself, misogynistic pig".
But it's not just online, people have lost civility in the real world. I see so much absolutely rude ass behavior out there every fucking day now. People have stopped considering other people completely. "Greed is good" and "I got mine" have replaced "be kind" and "do unto others". I have no clue how we turn this shit around or if its even still possible.
I read and re-read this column, in an effort to understand the case you were making. I completely agree with your point that online communication has become coarse, vulgar, divisive, cruel, and unhinged. On the other hand, while I love your writing and appreciate your insight on so many topics, I was, at first, troubled by your statement that the Supergirl movie might have been "a more successful film" if the main character had been a "drunk sorority girl" who just wants to "party". I completely agree that the reactions of people who surely could have been more constructive, were inappropriate. But I can also see why they misinterpreted your comment as misogynist and demeaning, and immediately (but inappropriately) chose violence. When I first read the comment, it surprised me. I have been reading your columns for years, and don't believe you are capable of misogyny. I also know absolutely nothing about sci-fi/super hero films, so wasn't sure what to make of your comment in the social media post.
Your expertise in super hero and sci-fi stories is considerable. Perhaps you were trying to say that this genre called for the Super Girl character to be a drunk sorority girl in order to appeal to the (predominantly male) fans(?) If your intention was to communicate that super hero fans are unlikely to appreciate a more nuanced character whose drinking is a form of self medicating, and instead just want to see a "drunk sorority girl", I think your amazing strength as a writer could have made that clearer. Unfortunately, you may not have stuck the landing. That doesn't excuse the hateful responses you received. Or maybe I am still completely unclear about the case you are making.
I really appreciated this comment -- I think it highlights our tendency to stereotype, pigeonhole, and reduce people (and how it's not the exclusive to conservatives):
'I think there is also a revealing liberal bias to “drunk sorority girls,” as I know many women who were in sororities in college and attended their share of keggers. They were still bright, driven women. It was just college.'
Unfortunately, the ability to type does not also coincide with the ability to think. And that is the fatal flaw in online discourse. Instead we have people passionately expressing invective which is somehow cathartic for them, but lends nothing useful to discourse. And in fact, as Stephen has so accurately stated, it often brings out their very worst unbridled aspects. It's their "creatures from the id".
It's also cathartic to scream when you are alone, or to punch pillows. I know because I have done it. Once that's done, a long walk or some breathing exercises calms me down. So I can be polite while out in public or online, even with people I disagree with.
What a lovely synthesis of two distinct threads.
I believe this exact phenomenon has left us as a culture wide-open to manipulation, particularly by well-funded state disinformation campaigns that stretch back to the first Trump campaign (and across more than a decade of EU elections). And we seem to lack curiousity or introspection into how we've been manipulated through our divisions. This is an old story: hate *is* violence, and it's self-defeating and self-perpetuating, while choosing non-violence is both hard and brave.
Parenthetically, my wife was not keen on her girls' night viewing of Supergirl. Quote: I wouldn't have been as disappointed if I hadn't expected better (based on writing and directing from previous Superman movie).
Too many people who believe their way of seeing the world is the only correct one and don’t mind letting everyone else know, loudly. It’s so tiresome.
I'm scared of where we are all heading. A while back, before twitter became a nazi bar, I had a rando tell me he would gladly shoot me because I had a different opinion from (presumably) him. I point blank asked him if he was really willing to shoot a fellow American over politics and he answered yes. A few days ago, I saw Raskin and Lawler get into a shouting match in Congress and my first thought was "we are almost at the point of someone getting beat by a cane". I have thoughts about Israel, and I don't think it's antisemitic to point out that as a nation, it is very bad, pretty much an apartheid state and I try not to vote for anybody who continues to support it. I don't think they are our ally in any sense of the word. If someone wants to call me names for that, whatever, I guess. But if you start getting physical, that's a whole different ballgame.
As far as Supergirl goes, we didn't go see it because A) movie tickets have become stupid expensive and B) I heard it was dark and murky to hide the bad visual effects. I do see your point that drunk sorority girl might be more fun and lighthearted, especially for a summer superhero movie, than a deeply troubled young woman, but I'm not sure that should end with "go fuck yourself, misogynistic pig".
But it's not just online, people have lost civility in the real world. I see so much absolutely rude ass behavior out there every fucking day now. People have stopped considering other people completely. "Greed is good" and "I got mine" have replaced "be kind" and "do unto others". I have no clue how we turn this shit around or if its even still possible.
I read and re-read this column, in an effort to understand the case you were making. I completely agree with your point that online communication has become coarse, vulgar, divisive, cruel, and unhinged. On the other hand, while I love your writing and appreciate your insight on so many topics, I was, at first, troubled by your statement that the Supergirl movie might have been "a more successful film" if the main character had been a "drunk sorority girl" who just wants to "party". I completely agree that the reactions of people who surely could have been more constructive, were inappropriate. But I can also see why they misinterpreted your comment as misogynist and demeaning, and immediately (but inappropriately) chose violence. When I first read the comment, it surprised me. I have been reading your columns for years, and don't believe you are capable of misogyny. I also know absolutely nothing about sci-fi/super hero films, so wasn't sure what to make of your comment in the social media post.
Your expertise in super hero and sci-fi stories is considerable. Perhaps you were trying to say that this genre called for the Super Girl character to be a drunk sorority girl in order to appeal to the (predominantly male) fans(?) If your intention was to communicate that super hero fans are unlikely to appreciate a more nuanced character whose drinking is a form of self medicating, and instead just want to see a "drunk sorority girl", I think your amazing strength as a writer could have made that clearer. Unfortunately, you may not have stuck the landing. That doesn't excuse the hateful responses you received. Or maybe I am still completely unclear about the case you are making.
I really appreciated this comment -- I think it highlights our tendency to stereotype, pigeonhole, and reduce people (and how it's not the exclusive to conservatives):
'I think there is also a revealing liberal bias to “drunk sorority girls,” as I know many women who were in sororities in college and attended their share of keggers. They were still bright, driven women. It was just college.'
Unfortunately, the ability to type does not also coincide with the ability to think. And that is the fatal flaw in online discourse. Instead we have people passionately expressing invective which is somehow cathartic for them, but lends nothing useful to discourse. And in fact, as Stephen has so accurately stated, it often brings out their very worst unbridled aspects. It's their "creatures from the id".
It's also cathartic to scream when you are alone, or to punch pillows. I know because I have done it. Once that's done, a long walk or some breathing exercises calms me down. So I can be polite while out in public or online, even with people I disagree with.
I have a dammit doll for just those occasions.