John Fetterman's Undeniable MAGA-ness
He's not on our side, just his own.
I’ve argued in the past that John Fetterman probably wouldn’t switch to the Republican Party, despite his cratering support among Democrats (his current party, if you’re rightfully confused by his behavior lately). Not even founding Sinema Party member Kyrsten Sinema defected to the GOP, and she couldn’t easily joined Susan Collins and Lisa Murkowski as pro-corporate Republicans in every way other than their support for abortion rights, which they do very little to uphold.
Of course, Sinema might’ve seamlessly fit into a John McCain-style GOP that no longer exists. Collins and Murkowski are enablers of the current GOP but they don’t reflect its true loathsome spirit. MAGA dominates the Republican Party, and MAGA stands for little else other than cultural resentment and petty grievance. It’s why, despite what else they might have believed in their lives, Robert F. Kennedy Jr. and Tulsi Gabbard are fully MAGA. And so is John Fetterman.
Fetterman’s undeniable MAGA-ness was on display during his tiresome media tour for his new book, Unfettered, which you should not purchase, read, or even use to train puppies.
He continues his ongoing broadside against the political left, which he treats as the entire Democratic Party. Even after mainstream Democrats Abigail Spanberger and Mikie Sherrill overwhelmingly won their elections in Virginia and New Jersey, he’s still chasing phantoms on the far left. During an interview with CNN’s Dana Bash, Fetterman offered an absurd paranoid fantasy about his perceived enemies.
“The right would say really rough things and names,” Fetterman whined, “but on the left, it was like they want me to die or that ‘We’re cheering for your next stroke’ ... they even have a gif where they have a stroke in your head.”
“Oh my gosh,” Bash exclaimed, rather than challenging his delusions.
Fetterman suggests that the right is only guilty of a little friendly ribbing toward him. This is demonstrably untrue. After Fetterman’s stroke in May 2022, Republicans insisted he was too enfeebled to serve in the Senate. Retiring GOP Sen. Pat Toomey, who Fetterman eventually replaced, said, “It’s just not possible to be an effective senator if you cannot communicate.” Former Pennsylvania Sen. Rick Santorum (don’t Google) said on Newsmax, “John Fetterman is simply not capable of doing this job. He’s hiding in his basement, he’s not able to talk, he’s not able to process.”
Then-Republican National Committee Chair Ronna McDaniel openly mocked Fetterman’s post-stroke speaking abilities. Donald Trump Jr. took it even further, calling Fetterman “the brain-dead potential senator from Pennsylvania” at a Florida rally in November.
“I believe that if you’re going to be in the United States Senat[e], you should have basic cognitive function … like, to have a working brain.…” Trump Jr. said “But that’s what we’re up against. We’re up against a Democrat Party today that doesn’t believe that a United States senator should not have mush for brains. ‘Mush for brains should be 100 percent fine,’ that should be the Democrat slogan for 2024.”
Donald Trump Jr. was the opening act for his father, who didn’t object to his son’s gross remarks. No one speaking at a Zohran Mamdani rally would ever say this because Mamdani doesn’t traffic in common cruelty.
The following year, Trump Jr. referred to Fetterman as a “vegetable.” This was around the time when a right-wing conspiracy theory emerged that suggested Fetterman’s wife, Giselle Fetterman, was trying to pass off a “Fake Fetterman” as her still incapacitated husband.
When Fetterman sought treatment for depression in February 2023, the pundits on his new favorite cable network were quick to pounce. Tucker Carlson said, “It’s news to no one that John Fetterman is unfit to serve in the United States Senate—he was not fit to run for office, but the cynical people around him, including his supremely cynical wife, pushed him to do it because of their lust for power.”
The right really hated Giselle Fetterman, as if she radiated Hillary Clinton and Michelle Obama vibes. American Majority PAC’s Ned Ryun compared Giselle Fetterman to Lady Macbeth.
“She is very ambitious, and she used her impaired husband as the vehicle to achieve some of her ambitions,” Ryun told host Laura Ingraham, who’d spent most of the 2022 campaign spreading rumors about Fetterman’s health.
“All the people who made [Fetterman] continue with his run should be ashamed of themselves,” Ingraham said. “Democrats in the media pushed Fetterman into a job he was not up to doing.”
Ingraham directly compared Fetterman to President Joe Biden: She claimed that both men’s faculties were criminally diminished and that they were hiding behind their puppet master wives.
The evidence supporting this “Lady Macbeth” theory was lacking. Fox News played up an apparent gaffe from Biden, who said she was “gonna be a great, great lady in the Senate.” (We’re under no obligation now to try and rationalize Biden’s frequent flubs.)
Fox News host Harris Faulkner mocked Gisele Fetterman in November 2022 for seeking “15 minutes of fame” because she dared pose with her husband outside his new Senate office. Guest Clay Travis said, “The reality here is that it does feel as if Pennsylvania has elected his wife, and she certainly is furthering that idea with these photos.”
Conservative columnist Tiana Lowe Doescher said, “The actual Senator-elect is halfway cut out of the photo!!! She wanted this so badly for herself lol. I hope subjecting her husband and her marriage to this was worth her 15 minutes.”
Contrary to the right-wing narrative, Giselle Fetterman doesn’t have grand political aspirations for which her husband is a vessel. She’s apparently just a supportive wife who dares have opinions of her own. Of course, that would make her a MAGA public enemy. No, it seems far more likely that Fetterman remained in the race and later the Senate, despite his health issues, because he craves attention and external validation. It’s what he wants more than anything else, including his wife’s peace of mind.
This might explain Fetterman’s performance on False Equivalency Theatre, where he seriously compares rage posts from Wokemeister420 on Bluesky to vicious screeds from Fox News pundits or Donald Trump Jr.
No one actually equivalent on the left — Rachel Maddow, for instance — has ever cruelly attacked Fetterman or wished that he’d have another stroke. Of course, the harshest critics on the left rarely even mention his wife, nor personally attack her. I’m more inclined to condemn the people who go after my wife, but Fetterman is seemingly too self-obsessed to prioritize Gisele.
The right has admittedly let up on Fetterman and openly flatters him, but that’s not because they no longer think his brain is mush. They just consider him useful mush. After Fetterman’s latest health scare last week, many of the same Republicans who just a couple years ago dragged both him and his wife now claimed they were “praying” for his speedy recovery.
Perhaps Fetterman is enough of a narcissist that he expects everyone will love him and never criticize him, no matter what he does. He’s aware that he’s lost support from the people who helped elect him but he blames them for this apparent “betrayal.” He’s incapable of critically assessing his own actions.
Fetterman predictably uses Unfettered to criticize Pennsylvania Gov. Josh Shapiro, Although Fetterman has found time to dine with Donald Trump, he’s not on speaking terms with the Democratic governor of his state. Fettermans claims Shapiro is too driven by “political ambition,” but Shapiro at least has remained true to what he says he believes. Still, it wouldn’t surprise me if John Fetterman speaks at the 2028 Republican National Convention in opposition to Democratic nominee Josh Shapiro. That’s a MAGA move suitable of both Tulsi Gabbard and RFK Jr.
It's important to understand that Fetterman's stroke happened because he has a very serious heart condition. Despite having an implanted pacemaker to control lethal tachyarrhythmias, he recently had a serious episode of vfib, resulting in a fall and injury requiring hospitalization. Thanks to tax-payer funded, lavish healthcare provided to political elites like Fetterman, he received excellent, life saving care. Us tax payers, thanks to his votes, are not eligible for, and most can't afford, anything close to Fetterman's healthcare coverage. I am happy he is recovering. Too bad for the rest of us.
Sinema in a hoodie.
Nice job vetting your fucking candidates, Dems.